Thursday, 8 May 2014

My baby has Pubic Hair... *dies a little inside*

Gin, mammasaurus, blog, mammasaurus blog, photography,
Photo by +Annie Spratt 
OK lets talk about the fact that Kyd has hit Puberty....
 
*grabs a large glass of gin*
 
How the hell do you deal with that???
 
I knew it was coming, it was inevitable and that in the case of a child with Down Syndrome, they can hit that stage running and early... as young as 10 or 11...
 
How do you explain to a child of that age that they will now get 'THOSE' feelings? Or 'THAT' hair?
 
Because I hadn't really thought about that. Kyd was my baby he was never going to get hair, you know, down there. He was never going to think about 'THAT' or be touching 'THAT' or do 'THAT'.
 
*I know you know what I mean with each 'THAT'*
 
So how do I have 'THAT' conversation with a child that has only really just come to terms with the fact he has one and I am not sure would fully understand what I was talking about.
 
He is only 11.
 
He is not ready...
 
OK, OK... I'm not ready!!
 
When the Paediatrician said to me last summer she thought  he was hitting puberty and does he have hair yet... I was sick in my mouth!
 
What do you mean PUBERTY?? He was only 10 and he'd started getting spots on his back and I asked what she thought it was...
 
'the start of Acne probably puberty' she said
'Has he got hair too?' she said
 
'WHAT?? I, ummm, I dunno, I haven't looked that closely for ages' I said dazed and in shock
'He's been a lot more modest recently, so I have no idea' I said
 
She chuckled and told me to just 'look out for it' next time I get a glimpse.
 
A little piece of me died inside in that moment.
 
Oh WOW, ummmmmm NO WAY!
My baby!
My teeny tiny baby!
He can't be growing up that quickly!
NOPE, I'm not having it!
He shouldn't be doing this for a few more years yet and so I am going to ignore it... FOREVER!
 
Denial is a great place *does a little denial dance whilst downing more gin*
 
Gin, www.cheetahsinmyshoes.com, fridge, gin, help,
Photo by +Jenny Smith 
I was actually sick a little more in my mouth the day I saw 'a hair' in fact there were a few.
 
I know, I know, TMI (too much info)
 
That was the day denial became reality and I had to come to terms with the fact he is growing up and is now a fully blown pubetic young man.
 
So how do I tell him that?
 
We have been through the 'Underwear Rule' but I'm not sure he understands it fully. I have made it clear nobody is to touch it apart from him and that he must tell me if they do...
 
What if he takes that literally and starts telling me if his 'girlfriend' touches him when he's older?! I don't want to know about that *shudders*
 
How do I distinguish between the two?
 
How do I explain sex?
 
Oh my god *gulps down a big mouthful of Gin* I want my baby back, it was much simpler then.
 
I need to explain his new hygiene routines, trimming *pukes in mouth again*, appropriate behaviour, times for touching and times to ignore that feeling.
 
Let alone the fact he is going to get erections
*gulps down more gin*
Masturbation
*takes a bigger mouthful of drink*
Ejaculation
*starts crying a little whilst drinking a bit more* 
I know that school will do a lot of this during this year, but I need to prepare myself for the questions and actually have answers.
 
I think next week will be my week to read up on
'How to explain puberty to a child with Down Syndrome?'
 
I'm hoping that the Down Syndrome Association have some info for me to read.
 
I need all the help I can get...
*downs the last bit of gin and refills the glass*
 
Wish me luck!!
 
Signiture, Alice, My Life My Son My Way,
 

5 comments:

  1. Oh Alice - *hands over very large gin* My experience in this is limited and a long time ago, but when I was 17 I was doing some charity work with a school friend in what was then called a Mencap Gateway Club one evening a week. The group we helped at had 5 boys and one girl attend, all between the ages of 13 and 16, all going through puberty. We were given the task of helping to explain what was and wasn't appropriate behaviour to them when it came to sex. We had to deal with everything from one who sat in the corner masturbating whilst everyone else was playing skittles to the lad who grabbed one volunteer by the hand, led her out of the room saying "come on Sara, let's get pregnant"! It was quite an eye-opener I can tell you.


    There was a lot of role-play I seem to recall and lots of explaining that there were certain things only to be done at home, not when at the club. I'm sure Kyd's school will have a way of handling all this - after all it's something all kids go through. And hopefully they'll have someone more experienced than a 17 year old me!

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  2. Aaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh can I have a glass with you? Good luck, I'm sure you'll take it in your stride, as you always do!

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  3. Oh my, no words of advice I'm afraid just handing over more gin

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  4. Oh Alice Dyl is 10 too and I havent had any conversations with him either. I know I don't have the added worry of how much is understood but I am dreading this with a boy, Periods and girls seemed so much easier. Dyl now shuts the door when he uses the bathroom so I am unsure what is going on down there too!

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  5. Oh Alice what a nightmare. I'm totally in denial and running away from it all. But we have to be good parents. I have to be better than mine were, and face up to it, so they know they can talk if they want to. Good luck lady!

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