Wednesday, 23 January 2013

The Art of Medically Pooping

Following on from my projectile pooping post the other day, I thought I'd add in Kyd's pooping talents too.

Yep! My life really does revolve around s**t!

As scary as you non parents and parents to be may find this


Kyd has issues parting with it & Rocky has issues holding on to it!

Kyd has a medical condition though so he has an excuse.

He has got used to it over time and so have we,

yet every time he goes it is astounding!

The whole process is madness.


He has the Art of Medically Pooping down to a T!

He doesn't poo all week and then has loads of meds 



It's like mount Vesuvius turned upside down!

The smell is like some sort of in house death gas.

Even he laughs at the over flow of extract from his nether regions.

Often pretending to faint at the smell and making you look at what he's done!!

He is a trooper though as this a very painful experience and if we didn't laugh...

Well, we'd cry....

A Lot!!

I assure you you've never seen or smelt anything like it in your lives!

I hope you never do either

But again like my last post...

IF you ever have to deal with Kyd and his Meds I'll give you this bit of advice...

 Don't make a massive fuss as he gets a bit sensitive.

Do, do a courtesy flush half way through.

If you don't do the above make sure you have a plunger.

Don't have a hangover.

Don't eat just before.

DO store some fabreeze in the toilet effected.

As parents you often think about the S word, you think about it day and night...

If only that S word was the same S word as the non parents' S word...

That'd be nice!

Monday, 21 January 2013

The Art of Projectile Pooping

Rocky has many talents from shrieking at out of this world heights of noise to making people smile at first glance.


We have a new one...

A new talent that only a parent could be proud of...

Well, a parent, an Aunt, a Cousin, an Odd Friend or just a reader with a sense of humour....

'So what is this new talent?' I hear you cry...


Yep the boy can poop it and shoot it over a metre at any given time during changing.

But he doesn't prepare you for it!

Oh No!!

That is part of the art of Projectile Pooping!

...Part of the Game!

He likes to do it when you're not ready, when you think you're safe!

When you least expect it and usually when you've just cleaned his bum.

Because he's lovely like that!

Kyd used to projectile pee so maybe projectile toileting is genetic?!

So fellow friends and family of whom may one day look after Rocky...

Be warned!

Be prepared!

Be on your guard!

His bum is as scary as any fully grown man after a Curry Night and a few Old Speckled Hen's!


When we get home and you tell us he pooped all over you or all over the floor...

We will laugh because

Right here,

Right now,

Was your warning!

So you should've prepared yourself better!

(So Ha!... go get the hand wash and some Dettol!)

If by any chance the next victim of Rocky's Projectile Poop is a non reader of my blog....

Well it's their own bloody fault, they should read my bloody blog!

They deserve everything they get!

Saturday, 19 January 2013

He Rolled Over and MORE!

Core Blimey the excitement we got as Rocky rolled from front to back was overwhelming.... it's not as if we've been waiting for months or anything... lazy little... 



a week later (as in today) he did it the other way too! 


He sat up!!! 

All by himself!!


He started Baby Led Weaning and is eating finger foods already!

Talk about showing off!


Anyway we are over the moon here at Hotel Baihoff, he is a bit wobbly on his bum still but he is getting there!

My little boy is all growd up!


Friday, 18 January 2013

Snow Go for Kyd!

Snow again! 

Bloody Snow!

That white stuff children up and down the country are enjoying as we speak...

But not one little boy...

Not our Kyd!

He will only throw 1 snowball in this snow... on the walk home from school behind my back.

He will only watch others playing and building snowmen rather than getting stuck in himself.

He will sigh and look sad, as he stares out of the window at them laughing and joking.

He will cry, stomp and scream as I stop him from escaping outside.

And he will hate me for it...


He will hate me that bit more if he can hardly breathe and is on a months worth of Antibiotics.

So for now I am the devil.

And he is hard done by...

Until he gets stuck building his lego and needs me to help!

Sunday, 13 January 2013

Disciplining my child with Down Syndrome!

Do not underestimate my child’s understanding of right and wrong! 

Over the past 10 years I have read up on, listened to and watched others, to find the best way to bring up Kyd as a child with Down Syndrome but also as a child in general. What I have learnt is that actually there is no difference just a few extra hurdles for those with disabilities.

Like any other parent, my aim is to bring him up the best way I can. Give him every opportunity to be the best he can possibly be and become a decent and loved person... we just have it a little harder than most to enforce those opportunities through illness, progression and through prejudice but let’s face it, so do many others without disability, so this isn’t a hurdle that can’t be beat with the right understanding of the world and the right understanding of other people.

We have yet to come across any sort of prejudice first hand but I know several people that have. I constantly read about how people with Down Syndrome come up against prejudice in the big wide world and so this does worry me for years to come but I think it is how you prepare them for this which is the key.
Kyd will be fine in the future and he will have the life and the job he loves until he hits old age, I just know it. As he has this ability to get what he wants already aged 10, a determination that you can see growing every day and a way about him that makes everybody smile.

He is a 10 year old boy, he misbehaves, he has tantrums and he stomps around like any other 10 year old would when he doesn't get his way. I struggle with him because he's so strong but I knew this was coming and so I put the ground work in early.... I TOLD HIM OFF REGULARLY! Making him completely able to make the decisions of what is right and what is wrong... obviously he is at a different level to a 10 year old and understanding danger is a big problem but if he gets told off for something once.... he doesn't do it again! (well most of the time). This is how I know he will get on fine in life and follow instructions at school or at work!
I don’t see why he wouldn’t achieve anything he put his heart to really, if I’m completely honest I think he will probably have more opportunities than others because of the way he is. When I say that, I don’t mean because of his Down Syndrome I mean because of him, his personality, his humour, his determination and his people skills. He is probably the most sociable and determined person I have ever met and he has this way of making you smile and think twice about original thoughts and prejudices. I have had several people say to me ‘I thought downs kids were different to that, you know’ and my response is always ‘they are no different than you or me!’  

I often see people looking at him and smiling when out and about, whilst he wipes the sick up from his brothers face after feeding him, when he shouts my name from across the room and then when I respond to him, he shouts ‘smells’ really loudly, when he has a fit of giggles at a man in a Manchester Utd shirt dropping something down his front on a bus and then says ‘they’re rubbish’... making several people pat him on the head.

I often see people smile at him but I never wonder why, he’s just funny and I don’t think this will ever change.

I do think though this is due to the way we are with him, the way he has been brought up. I am not blowing my own trumpet here, I am blowing the ones of all those around us though, as they have had a huge role to play in the way he is today. 

I see others struggling to deal with Kyd’s behaviour and making excuses for him instead of telling him off and I am constantly saying politely (and shouting at them in my head) ‘DISCIPLINE HIM’ it is key for others to tell him off too, he needs to learn. I also see people fussing over him because he is ‘different’ and I think ‘unwrap the cotton wool for god’s sake or he will never learn’. What would you do with a ‘normal’ child if they were misbehaving? You’d tell them off... so why are you saying ‘ahhh bless him, he doesn’t understand’, when he blatantly does understand it?! Don’t underestimate him, Kyd knows exactly who he can play up with and who he can’t, he knows who will pity him and who will tell him to stop being silly. HE ISN’T STUPID! He is laughing at you because he thinks he can get away with it, he’s devious and cunning... just like any other 10 year old boy... and this is the case in most children with certain disabilities!

I have been very clear to everyone around us that if you see Kyd misbehaving you tell him off. I’d expect that for Rocky in the future too as a ‘normal’ child, so why not him. I think it is key to knowing boundaries and key to having respect for those around you to have others pipe up when you are in the wrong. I grew up being told off by any adult in my presence if I was naughty and I think we are all too scared to do so now, especially in the presence of disability.

I know that some have very good reasons for the way they behave and so you must never judge at first sight but its funny how you can tell instantly the difference between ones with ‘cotton wool’ mums and ones of whom have genuine reasons as to why they behave the way they do, just by watching the reaction of the parent.

I wouldn’t recommend screaming at a random child in the street obviously but I do think sometimes, when appropriate, you do need to step up and say ‘Behave yourself’ no matter what their ability.

What I have learnt from Kyd and from those around me, is that treating him as though he is no different than any of his peers will give him the best start in life. When he grows up he will have to deal with the real world, giving him the real world now will give him the opportunity to learn to step over those who put him down and jump over those hurdles presented to him in the future.

I think you’ll be seeing a lot more of Kyd and his friends in the future too, so just remember this...

Treat others how you would wish to be treated yourself and don’t underestimate the ones ‘you think’ don’t understand... because they more than likely do and they are more likely to be laughing at and pitying you, than you are them.

Tuesday, 1 January 2013

2012 can do one!!

This time last year I was full of hope and fear about whether my test results on my tiny pregnant bump would come back saying the baby had my crazy genetics.

Alas, at the beginning of this year the results came back clear and we knew that the baby boy I was carrying was fit and healthy and clear of my dodgy genes.

'This' I said 'Is the best start to, what will be, an amazing year'

I couldn't have been more wrong.


Don't get me wrong!

My baby boy has to be one of the best things ever to have happened to me in my whole life, the others being Kyd and meeting Hoff **try not to puke**

Having my long awaited well planned baby though, would turn out to be the hardest thing I would go through in a long time and it follows me into 2013 like a bad smell.

So why has 2012 been so crappy?...

I have dealt with a rare rib disease, odd labour pains, stupid symptoms and hospital stays. Medical neglect, a severe above the knee DVT leaving me unable to walk, in a lot of pain and unable to breastfeed, leave the house or even enjoy my baby, oh and a few infections to add to the mix too. Followed by, daily then weekly blood tests, veins failing, suspected MS, lots of MRI tests & scans, a cyst on my spinal cord and being unable to feel my feet through pins & needles, oh and not being able to treat my ribs due to being on Warfarin.... and a massively fat granny leg!

Amongst that lot, I have lost too many friends this year, who should be with us now but are sadly amongst the stars and with the fairies, as a few of my friends would say. I have watched their families grieve and the flowers on their grave side wilt... but my memories will stay strong and I'll never forget them.

2012 in all respect to it's Sporting and Patriotic goodness, for me, can sod off!

But I do have a lot to be grateful for and for this I will be truly in debt to 2012 forever.

This is what I wake up to every day. 

I will never take them for granted as time is short. I learnt this year that anything can happen and it can devastate yours and everyone else's life within seconds. I was the lucky one, I caught that blood clot before it hit anywhere fatal and I have my life to look forward to. I can fight the rest of it and I can be where I want to be and do what I want to do... others don't have that luxury.

So for 2013... I promise to fight it all with a smile, be grateful for what I've got and love the ones close to me... OHHHH and marry the best and most patient (irritating and bonkers) man I have ever met... whether he likes it or not!

Here's to 2013!! 
**takes a deep breath, closes eyes, crosses fingers, prays and hopes for the best**