Thursday, 9 February 2012

Pregnancy Diary: 6th-7th Jan - Pillows and Dreams

6th January: I NEED A DECENT PILLOW!!!
I have got the worst neck ache EVER! I need a massage so desperately my back feels like its screaming ‘FIX ME!’ I need help. I know the cause, it’s my blasted pillows. Feather pillows are all so lovely when you first plump them up and lay down... but within an hour you are flat on the bed and you wake with a crick in the neck. I need a new pillow quick before I need a new back. I tend to hug a pillow on a night already, I have done for years. It gives me extra support for my body and it’s helped lots of issues I’ve had over the years. I think now is the time to get a specially designed pregnancy pillow though as I think it will become a huge part of my life over the next few months... well hopefully... all going well!
I’ll have to do my research though... I’d never have thought Pillows would be this high on my agenda right now but they are... Oh how times have changed.
7th December: This Weekend is dragging
How can one weekend take so much longer to disappear than all the others? The time for the CVS test is looming and I just want to get on with it and get it over with. I think I’ve been patient enough now and people are starting to guess that I’m pregnant so the sooner I can announce it the better! I’m struggling to keep it under wraps now and when people ask I’m just not lying any more as I’ve got to the stage that I need to just scream it from the roof tops. Knowing that every other pregnant couple can announce it by the 12th week and we can only sit and wait just isn’t fair. My brain is popping and my belly is growing and my heart is bursting with awkward nervous energy and I still have to wait two more weeks until we know. I keep catching myself getting excited about being a mum again, then kicking myself and telling myself I’m being stupid because how did I know this was going to happen? It was all down to fate now wasn’t it. I couldn’t change it even if I wanted too. I am useless in this situation, I’m a self confessed control freak and this is a situation I can’t control and that is killing me! I’m supposed to be trying to stop my stress at this important time and this is just making it worse. Just hurry up and end please weekend of hell, I need a break.

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